We love our evolved, switched on and 21-century modern men and in the great melee of change that has swept American society over the past quarter of a century, few areas have evolved and changed quite as much as the domain, of the heterosexual American man. Now hold on to your hats everyone, this is not a post about what should’ve or had to have, we all know there are still many areas that our society needs to do better in. But, it must also be said that many of us have a man on our arms that would make Simone de Beauvoir proud, so here are 5 great ways to show some love, to your 21st-century gent.
Your man might be a product of this new society that needed very little “training”, or he might have had to be the type to do a lot of soul searching to realise his new, evolved role. Whichever way you want to look at it, we all like to be recognised for what we’re doing right, and men are no exception. Men respond particularly well to being recognised and valued for the last vestiges of “traditional masculinity” that still exist for them. This means, being a good father, husband and provider – and it doesn’t matter how interchangeable those roles may be in your household, the genetics of man means that they’re pre-programmed to want to take care of their tribe, in their castle. In this area, words are not cheap. They matter, so while you’re out there conquering the world, take some time to remind your man that you still, at least on some level, love that he was the one who conquered your heart.
THE WAY TO A MAN’S HEART
It might sound old fashioned or clichè, but there is something altogether primal about preparing a feast for your man and sharing in those spoils of war together. Find out from his Mom or mates what his favourite meal is if you don’t already know and hook that surprise up. Send the kids to the sitter (Nanna), turn the lights down and spend some precious alone-time together, over a favourite dish. This is not just a great idea to have some time with each other and only with each other, but our shared human experience responds to the ritual of food. And this totally counts as a date night. So maybe do it on a Friday and the kids can spend the night, at Nanna’s.
APPEARANCES MATTER, EVEN TO HIM
You didn’t think that you are the only one that gets hit hard by those magazines that are constantly pushing the perfect body, did you? Men are just as susceptible to social programming from the fashion industry and from what their friends and peers are doing in the gym and what they’re wearing to work. Women tend to feel more pressure to be fashion-forward and keep in shape to a degree, but men tend to feel very insecure around issues of hair loss and those washboard abs. While you can’t really help out too much in the abs department, you can buy finasteride tablets online, especially if you know this is an area he might be embarrassed or shy in. They are proven to help with male pattern baldness, but remember – no matter the state of his hairline, remind him that he’s sexy anyway.
LOOKING GOOD, FEELING GORGEOUS
They might not always show it, but men feel a huge amount of pressure (still) to keep fighting the good fight without showing anyone that they’re doing it. This tendency to bottle it all up in due deference to the famed upper lip causes many real-world problems in today’s man. This means that spending more time with family in communal pursuits that affirms his “whys” and motivates him to keep on keeping on, is crucial. There is so much “life” happening to American families today, so keeping time open – making time for your whole family rather, is a top-quality pursuit. A great way to constructive time together as a family is working out together. You’ll love the bonding experience achieving goals with your family will bring and he will love the opportunity to show off with the kids (and you). So prepare one workout a week that you can all do, together.
You can’t fight millennia of evolution. We have all learned how to embrace change and how to communicate better. Certainly in America, we’ve all learned how to lighten up a little. But don’t be fooled. The media pushes this image of the “ever-ready” male, ready to pounce at any opportunity and its most basic level, this primal urge may hold some truth. But today’s man values a healthy monogamous relationship with his other half and as research fresh out of the United States suggests, it is in now modern women who find themselves more comfortable with the idea of “cheating” than men do. But be this as it may and with respect to everyone’s idea of the perfect working relationship, acknowledging and honouring that part of your man that still makes him a “man” will yield great benefits on many different levels. From a deeper connection to verbal as well as non-verbal communication to an increased sense and feeling of closeness, men are at their best when “the inner caveman” is let out to play…at least once in a while.